flat cat

When I started my “new” job, I had a strong feeling that since this position interacts with the public at large much more than my other job, it would lend itself for all sorts of blog anecdotes and stories. In fact when I first started, my boss’ brother, who comes in often and is also a vet, told me that I would have encounters with a lot of crazies and if I had the talent or knew someone who has the talent, I should put together a book of the craziest of the crazy. not in so many words but, you get the idea.

I’ve had a few people grace the front of the reception desk that were definitely blog worthy but this one takes the cake. This story isn’t even mine; it’s about a quarter mine and three-quarters my supervisor’s, but who’s blog is this?

giphy-1

A man came in with his cat to be seen my the doctor on Saturday and after I checked him in, I had to tell my supervisor that in addition to whatever he told me what was wrong with the cat, it also needed something else. Medication, maybe? I can’t remember. This conversation followed: *keep in mind, my supervisor is an excitable Haitian man with a heavy accent*

Me: Hey, F – Mr. whatever his name is also needs ______ whatever, i forgot.

F: Yea? OK. You know, that guy is crazy. Were you here last week when he came in? No, you weren’t. He came in last week with a cat that was *flattening hand motions*

Me: Flat?

F: Yea, the cat was dead. It got hit by a car so the head was all smashed and everything.

Me: giphy-2

F: Yea. He came in and wanted us to bathe the cat because one of his cats had gotten out and he was convinced that this was his cat.

Me:Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt gross ew titus andromedon tituss burgess

F: I told him we would wash it if he wanted us to, but for sure the cat he was holding was not his cat. He asked me how I know it’s not his so I told him because the cat you’re holding is white and your cat is brown. Do you know what he said to me? He said, Yea, I was wondering if when they die, if their fur changes color.

Me:

Me: Did you wash the cat?

F: No.The cat was dead! Cremate it! Who picks up a dead cat to check to see if it’s theirs? Does their fur change color? He’s crazy, I told you. He said his wife was on his case and that she had a strong feeling it was their cat. It wasn’t their cat! Their cat is brown!

So, now I’m back at the desk and my supervisor comes out and says Hey, Mr. whatever his name is! Did you find your cat?

WELL. I almost lost it.

It turns out, that night the man was in bed, watching TV and he has cameras all around his house so he happened to glance at one of the monitors and saw a cat on the screen that looked like his. He was happy his cat had made it home but he felt bad for the owner of the cat he had found.

Alls well that ends well, I guess.

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