martina is losing it #10

Ok, this is going to be a quick update because I’m at work & on my phone, with my boss right next to me and I don’t want to go on the computer because he’s the type to ask questions and if I don’t do this now, I probably won’t later…

How’s that for a run on sentence?

Anyway, last week was a good week with me losing another 2 pounds. That made my total weight loss 42 point something (6 maybe?) pounds.

This Thursweigh wasn’t so kind, but I kind of had a feeling it wasn’t going to be. When I did my little step on, look down, step off dance, I was hoping to be wrong.

I gained 1.6 pounds. I’d be lying (and totes dramatic) if I said I was devastated. Because, really, I wasn’t.

First of all, my eating and tracking wasn’t my best. I fit everything into my day, sometimes with points to spare, but I also had a little extra here and there without acknowledging it in the app (Appknowledging??).

Second, Aunt Flo is on her broomstick hovering over me. And that bitch brings baggage. She wants all the (salty) foods, all the time. She brings water and swelling and all other kinds of nonsense. So, I’m mostly blaming her. She’s a terrible aunt.

Then I took a beat, and added up my monthly losses and saw that in August I lost 8.8 pounds. I could live with that.

Quickly some thoughts:

  • I DO NOT see a change in my face. It’s getting really frustrating.
  • Lisa and I went to some art installation in the city (at Andy Warhol’s studio! Maybe I’ll write about it one of these days). After we left, we still had daylight so we did an impromptu photoshoot on the cobblestones of Wooster Street. She told me to jump, AND I DID IT. I made it into the air and didn’t kill myself on the way down. I would have never done that 40something pounds ago. The pictures…. well, let’s say my face needs work. I need help- LOTS OF IT.
  • I really need some new clothes. Like, fast. I can’t wait until it gets more Fall-like and I could start to go through my whole wardrobe. Get rid of stuff, buy new.
  • With the gain this week, my mind of course immediately went to “well, that’s it. It’s been a good run but now I’ll have a gain every week because that’s just how it works, right?” I say it all the time but the fear of gaining it all back, fear of this not being real, and fear of the gym* are here and they.are.REAL.

*the gym is not so much a fear, just something I have absolutely no interest/want in.

Ok, friends. That’s all I have (to give) for today.

Love you, mean it.

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