Vulcano eruption

Ever been in a situation where you have plans with a group of people and that’s great, but then the time comes and some people back out and it winds up that the group has dwindled down to the same people you always hang out with?

Last night Lisa, Jessica and I traveled all the way to the other end of Brooklyn to see Sal Vulcano (my personal favorite joker on Impractical Jokers) do some stand-up. Except it wasn’t just Sal performing, but if we’re being honest, I’m 89% sure that the whole room was waiting for him to come on. Maybe not the guy sitting behind us because he was kind of annoying and spilled beer on my bag and had commentary on every performer like he was some kind of comedy agent.

The venue was The Bell Room, which I kept calling the Bell Jar, a slight slip of the tongue that totally changes the mood. It used to be a warehouse but then the hipsters came in and made it a bar/performance space. all hipster shade aside, it was actually a nice place.

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Lisa and I had misjudged our Uber timing and got there about an hour before the doors opened. Luckily, there’s a bar, food station and photo booth in the front room. You guys know I looove a good photo booth. They’re the only reason I go to weddings these days. We met up with Jess and had a drink and, of course, hit up the photo booth.

We started on drink number two (yea, on a Thursday. JUDGEMENT FREE ZONE.) and to be totally honest, I’m not much of a drinker and I didn’t eat anything so I was feeling my two drinks pretty quick. The doors opened and we filed into the performance room. We wanted to be as close to the stage as possible. I personally like to be close to the stage because it’s a better experience. Who do the comedians usually heckle? The first three rows. What makes the night memorable and fun? Being heckled. You can disagree with me, but I can guarantee I’ll never go to a comedy show with you.

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The performance area also had a bar and being tipsy, I thought the best thing to do in that moment was a shot of Fireball. I mean, when in Rome, right? Long story short, after that shot, I was feeling goood, which is kind of pathetic, but I digress. By the middle of the first act, I had to use the bathroom in the worst way. So bad that Jessica told me to stop squirming. Now I have to make a decision – get up and walk to the bathroom in the middle of this guys set or wait until the host comes out to introduce the next act. I didn’t want to be rude, especially because I was in the front row. Also, my shoes were fancy and clicked when I walked, but since I was drunk this was a much bigger deal in my head than in real life.

So, to re-cap, I’m in the front row, drunker than I’ve been in a whiiile, wearing a shirt that says God Bless this Hot Mess, with a bursting bladder, noisy shoes and a fear that I’ll miss Sal’s set.

GOD BLESS.

Finally, I bit the bullet and ran/stumbled to the bathroom and, turns out, I was back before the first set was over.

Just so we’re 100% clear – I was there to see Sal. No disrespect to the other comedians because I truly did enjoy all of them, but that’s the truth. I wish they had taped this show because I would post it here to show how funny they all were, but they didn’t so I can’t. I can leave links to their Twitter accounts, though.

Michelle Wolf
Liza Treyger
Dan Soder
Jeffrey Joseph
Jo Firestone

The time came for Sal to come on and, thanks to my run to the bathroom I was considerably more sober. again, pathetic – i am fully aware. Why is this worth mentioning? It isn’t; I just figured I’d throw it in, set the scene. Anyway, Sal comes out to do his thang. And his thang he did. Call me biased (I am), but I enjoyed his set the most out of all of them.

woahhh what was that?

Nothing, just my inner fangirl showing up for the party. She’s embarrassing but inevitable.

Sal is a natural storyteller. I think that’s what I liked about his set. Sometimes, with other comics, you can tell it’s a bit. You see exactly where the joke is headed, you laugh and they move on to the next one. Not Sal. He told three stories and not once was there an awkward lull. He’s also kind of neurotic, which I appreciate.

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After the show, the room cleared out pretty quick. Our (I’m dragging Lisa and Jessica into this statement) intention was to meet Sal after the show, just to tell him that we’re fans and to maybe score a picture. Also, I was determined to not let my shirt go to waste. (check his twitter – he’s God blessing all over the place) Unfortunately, that did not happen. Not for us, anyway. What I failed to mention before was that the three of us were in a silent war with the girls next to us, who were clearly there for only Sal also. I didn’t mention it because it makes us sound completely insane, but we were also tipsy so I guess it evens out. Let me tell you, though – when I got home, I had the “brilliant” idea of checking the location tag on Instagram and there it was- in screaming color (#outofthewoods), our nemesis and Sal. This prompted me to screenshot it and send it with every crying emoji to Lisa. We lost this battle, but we’ll win the war.

ok, last dance, fangirl.

Bottom line – I had a great time on a school night. I wish Sal and I could have had a chuckle over my shirt (and his, for that matter. it was Nasty era Janet Jackson.) but there’s always next time. Unless he’s reading this. Sal, if you’re reading this – tweet me.

Fangirl OUT.

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