I went to my first bridal expo tonight. I’m so single my middle name might as well be Kraft, but that won’t stop be from being a supportive bridesmaid.
Here’s a decent sized list of what was going through my head as we walked through the expo.
- ohh trumpeters! I wonder if I could hire them to announce my every arrival. Google it later.
- this place is gorgeous. what can i throw a party for? being single? yea right.
- open bar! hallelujah!
- where did she get that cheese plate?
- i’m starving. where did everybody find cheese?
- potato puff? don’t mind if I do.
- ohmigod. what the heck is in these things? crack?
- found the cheese!
- oh, this is good cheese.
- these crackers are quality.
- moving on. let’s see what we could win.
- a kitchen aid mixer? score! i wonder if i need to be a bride-to-be to qualify.
- forget it. my mom has no counter space.
- but the hot pink is gorgeous.
- nah, i really don’t want to hear my mother.
- oh God, i still live with my parents.
- every woman in here is engaged. that’s weird. oh wait – bridal expo. right.
- that woman’s ring is huge! and sparkly!
- it would look great on my finger.
- i wonder if i ever will have one on my finger.
- get it together, martina
- weight loss shakes!
- ehh. one meal a day? i don’t know if i’m ready for all that.
- FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS HOLY THEY HAVE A PHOTO BOOTH!
- thank goodness lisa is here. at least i have someone to take pictures with.
- the pictures came out great!
- i need one of these for my house.
- maybe i could talk them into getting one at work.
- i wonder if they have any of those potato puffs left.
- they do! now hopefully she comes this way because i don’t want to lose my seat for the fashion show.
- i need a recipe for these puffs. and the mini spring rolls while we’re at it.
- show’s starting!
- i hope the DJ is good.
- the DJ is fantastic!
- why do they always change the song in the middle of my jam?
- i don’t care about today’s music! give me some 90’s dance tunes!
- i don’t know how i feel about these dresses. is this a wedding or a quinceañera?
- the bridesmaid options are nice.
- that’s me – always the bridesmaid, never the…
- don’t go there. it will happen. of course it will. it has to. please, God.
- maybe i’ll sign up for match.com when i get home.
- oh, cut it out. you’re lonely – not desperate.
- ehh.. maybe a little desperate.
- nope. definitely more lonely.
- God, I sound bitter.
- i’m not bitter, am i? nahh.
- i wonder if the bar is still open. i could smell wine.
- i don’t even like wine.
- they’re bringing out the desserts.
- BEST. COOKIE. EVER.
- why don’t they have these things for single girls? on second thought, no. i don’t think it would work.
- lights are on. time to go.
- i wonder if there are any cookies left.
- forget it. i’m going home.

And finally I thought I would include this song that I’ve been loving lately. It’s on topic because it’s a letter to her future husband. God love Meghan Trainor and her catchy tunes.